September 15, 1990, I went to my first concert. I was twelve years old and went to see New Kids on the Block with my mother, my little sister, and a couple of friends. I still have the ticket. I still remember most of the show. I remember watching the New Kids on the Block cartoon right after the Beetlejuice cartoon that morning, and I remember getting dressed, and I remember dancing and singing my pre-teen heart out. One of the most memorable things about that day for me, though, was not New Kids related. That day, according to my mother at the time, was also the anniversary of my diabetic diagnosis. Or might have been. She wasn't completely sure at the time and I think that date may have been wrong, because September 15th of 1979 was a Saturday, like this year, and also strangely like 1990. (Then again my pediatrician employed my grandmother as his nanny, so who knows? It was around that time, at least.)
I found it on the Internet so it must be true.
Regardless of the accuracy of the date, every year since that particular September 15th (which was more years ago than I care to openly admit, and I do it now only for educational purposes) on September 15th I've thought about it. I don't remember the day my parents were told I had diabetes- I was only 14 months old. In fact, I don't remember living a day without diabetes at all, which can be rotten on one hand and nice on the other. I don't know what I've been missing. But I think about it, even for a few days before the 15th hits, because it's...I don't know. It's a mark. It's tangible. It's the day that before became after. Even though technically I still had diabetes before, on that date my parents knew, and like the G.I. Joes say, knowing is half the battle.
The other half is awesome lasers and stuff.
I guess this time of year I just take a while to pause and reflect on things. Most people do that around their birthday, but I do it around mid-September. Another year with diabetes gone, another year older. My husband follows the diabetes news. He's always telling me about new advances in treatment, new theories on cures and stuff....I don't follow it. I guess I'm bitter. When I was a kid, it was "the decade of the cure." They were so sure when I was a kid that I wouldn't have diabetes as an adult...well, that didn't go as planned. Maybe someday I'll have another anniversary to reflect on- the anniversary of not having diabetes anymore. I'm not holding my breath.
John Lennon sang, "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." In a way I feel a little cheated that I never got to make plans before life slammed into me like a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, but it doesn't really matter. There are people with much bigger problems than mine, and even though I think about the before and after at this time of year, I've been a diabetic for over thirty years and I am in pretty good health, all things considered. So like I said, sometimes good...sometimes bad...sometimes both.
"...like having your brain smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick."
On a totally unrelated note, I'd just like to point out that I fit New Kids on the Block, Beetlejuice, G.I. Joe, John Lennon and Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy references in one blog. I win. :)
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